i'm a sinner

hello! & welcome to honey, dearest!

I was inspired to write today's blog post on sin. This past Mother's Day weekend I spent it hanging out with my husband's family. It is so nice to hang out with family considering I live 10 hours away from my dad and other family members (my father in law lives about 2 min away).

I had a pretty good weekend- spent time with hubby, got some stuff done around the house, and was able to rest. Mother's Day came around and we visited my husband's family, as I mentioned. Unfortunately, I didn't control myself too much and had one too many drinks. I was tipsy for a good portion of the afternoon time. It was terrible. I felt awful, and I wasn't being myself. I became way too loud and rowdy. Not only did I not control myself on how many drinks I had but I messed up my plans for the rest of the day. I expected to clean, organize, and cook after the get-together.

Instead I spent the evening in a dizzy state, feeling nauseous, and shame for my actions. I woke up the next morning feeling so shameful and silly for allowing myself to get that far.

So, I prayed & read the bible.

The reminder of being a sinner is one that I live with daily- I think we all do. Honestly, I don't think there's a single person in this world that has got it all together. I felt ashamed of my actions, and pondered on why I allowed myself to get that far. I realized that I prioritized having fun over being responsible. Lesson learned.

All this to say that Christian's are sinners. We make mistakes and constantly fail to live a life that is obedient to Christ. I think as I mature Spiritually, these moments will lessen. But, we encounter them often. Although this is just a physical representation of my sin, the real problem lies beneath the 'drunkenness'. It is the desire to be "fun" and "careless" that won my thought process over the voice of reason + the instruction of the Spirit. This is troublesome because this how sin grows. When we allow ourselves to continuously listen to the in-the-moment desires and not the Holy Spirit convicting us of an act of obedience, we create room for the growth of sin.

But you know what? It is okay. It is not okay to continue to sin, but it is okay in the sense that Jesus forgave me. He forgave my recklessness and He also knows that I am human, weak, and fragile. Without Him, I lack. He is the only one that can give us the strength. I made a mistake, and I repented and welcomed Christ into this because it is an area He needs to be present in to redeem.

I hope that if you are experiencing sin, just be honest with Him & welcome Him into your weakness. He will redeem you. Sometimes, Christ is with us helping us deal with our sin for years, and sometimes He helps us deal with it for hours. There was a sin I dealt with for a couple of years and I found myself repenting daily for struggling with this. A conversation for another day. Regardless, He is the only one that can redeem us and help sanctify us into a more holy being.

Much love,

Vanessa